We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'm at about main and main street
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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