It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
