and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I am mentally ready for anal.
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