That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
