It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
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She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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