Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just had sex bonerless
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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