Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
