If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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