apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
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I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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