is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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