were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize