Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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