Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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