that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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