I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
