how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
