Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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