Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"