i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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