did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
