please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
try to milk me bitch
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