Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
