If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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