She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
