did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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