p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
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I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
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She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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