Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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