if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
