margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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