I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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