The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
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