Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.