It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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