If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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