There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
