My brain says no but my pants say off.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize