Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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