If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize