My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
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I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
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I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize