I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
it's like heaven, but drunker
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
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A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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