Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
