Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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