Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
