hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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