I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
