Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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