You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
