I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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