I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
