well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
