If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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