If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
